Have you ever wondered if you’re sabotaging yourself, setting yourself up for failure, and blocking your success?
Self-sabotage can be hard to spot in yourself. It can show up as procrastination, overeating neglecting your self-care, or trying to make everyone else happy.
They say I’m stuck.
I’m in my own way.
I can’t see the forest through the trees.
Does that sound familiar?
But if that does sound familiar, I want you to know that you’re not too old, you’re not stupid, and you’re not broken.
You are perfect, just as you are.
You might have been operating with ineffective patterns and strategies throughout your life. But those can be rewired and change how you do things to create a life of success so you self-celebrate instead of sabotage.
Here are three critical pieces of the self-sabotaging process I’ve seen in my practice as a physical therapist and a transformational health and life coach.
How do you identify self-sabotaging behaviors?
Symptoms that could signal self-sabotage
These behaviors have sneaky little ways that keep you stuck. Here are some of the most common ones.
- Overthinking negative judgmental, or harsh self-talk
- Worrying about things you can’t control
- Living with the fear of the unknown
- People pleasing and worrying about what other people think of you
- Distracting yourself with food, shopping, keeping busy, and learning more, gathering more information
- Always running out of time
- Saying yes to things that you really want to say no to
- Easily upset and frustrated
- Out of touch with your feelings and afraid to feel them
I can show you how to spot them, release them, and change them out of your life.
What is an example of self-sabotage?
Do you find yourself saying:
- Life is hard
- I’m stuck
- I can’t
- I don’t
- I won’t
Do you experience similar patterns every day where you’re not seeing any significant change in your life, and you just feel like you’re going day in and day out, like Groundhog Day?
Do you do things that drain your energy? It could be eating or drinking certain foods. Or even spending time with people that drain your energy.
Do you get enough sleep? Are you gaining weight? Are you ignoring your self-care? Do you have a problem sitting still and being in silence?
You are not alone. These are common symptoms of self-sabotage.
I challenge you to look at self-care a little bit differently. Think of it not as selfish but rather essential for your success to live the happiest, healthiest, vibrant life of your dreams.
How do you identify self-sabotaging behaviors?
There is a unique pattern of self-sabotage within each individual woman. There is no one-size-fits-all and cookie-cutter approach and no recipe.
So it’s vital that you uncover the causes of your self-sabotage, learn from them, and gain awareness from them so that you can do things differently going forward.
Your beautiful insights will help you forgive yourself for what you’ve done in the past and allow you to make new choices in the future, feeling more empowered and confident.
Some causes of self-sabotaging behaviors that my clients recently uncovered:
- lack of self-worth
- lack of self-confidence
- lack of self-trust
- having a poor body image
- little or no time for self-care
As a child, I have a history of trauma, abuse, neglect, and abandonment while being an expert at distracting myself from feeling emotions. It can be traumatizing to be forcefully disciplined or manipulated by a caregiver/parent without the ability to express your needs. Many women feel as if they never learned how to be aware of their body’s cues and their natural body’s wisdom.
Common everyday struggles are being aware of when you are hungry, thirsty, full, or tired. Can I trust myself to cry, be sad, mad, or glad?
One of my favorite things to do with my clients is mental decluttering. In a loving, quiet, and calm space, I allow you to release and declutter the mental garbage that could have been there for years. Then, you’ll use your journal to release these self-sabotage patterns. You are permitted to feel all your feelings.
You will have new insights and awareness about yourself. You’ll identify what’s been blocked by the patterns and clutter in your brain.
Most people have about 11 million bits of information coming at us every second. Your unconscious mind can handle 40-50 bits of information per second. There is a lot of crap between your ears that need to be decluttered!
How do I stop self-sabotage?
Mental decluttering sessions are an effective way to release the underlying causes getting in your way and allow your mind, body, and spirit connection to find balance.
It’s a fun and inviting experience when you can feel your intuitive guidance after spending time stuffing it down and numbing it.